Prayer

Spent alot of time with my family this weekend because they are getting really clingy, mainly my mom. I know this is not just my observation anymore too, others are now noticing as well. It stinks because there's no way to make her happy anymore even if I do spend alot of time at home. She'll get upset or just kind of agitated I guess if I ask to go out or do anything. It makes me kind of sad because I really don't know what to do about it, I guess just deal with it. I spent all of Friday night with them, went out to dinner then spent the night at home. Saturday i went shopping all day with my mom, then went jogging with Corrie later at night, but still i had spent all day with her. Then today comes around and I spent the morning with the family but I want to spend time with others too. Corrie came over and we washed cars and hung out a little before church. Then my mom wanted me to come home for dinner after church, I don't think she realizes how much I enjoy staying afterwards at church, it is a great chance to really talk to people and fellowship and get to know about others lives and to have fun too. But tonight I came home for dinner, every Sunday is the same argument, but for some reason Sunday dinners are important to her, even though I am home many other nights for dinner.
It's just getting extremely hard to be sympathetic to her anymore, I can't even enjoy the times we are together because she's already upset about the next time I have planned to do something. As I was realizing today I only have 3 weeks left before i go to school and move out. It just sucks that those 3 weeks are going to be her mad at me the whole time becasue of how much I'm not home according to her.
I don't think she realizes that this is not exactly easy for me either. Yes i am excited to move away and eager, but I too am giong to be missing people, both family and friends, and I want to spend as much time with everyone as I possibly can before I go. It's not like I'm going to be gone forever, but I'm not coming home every weekend either as I think my mom wants me to.
When I had first decided that I was ready to move away from home and needed to move away from home, I don't think I could have predicted that things were going to get this way. I don't think they have to be this way either, but they are.
I love my mom and family so much and yet right now no one seems to be showing their love towards each other.

(I contemplated actually publishing this for a while, it's very open and puts me in a vulnerable position. But then I remembered something Tim said in a comment, that this blog is for me, it's nice if others read it too, but ultimately it's for me.
This started as a way to vent because I was frustrated, but what I realize right now as I am actually crying is that what I really need to do is ask for prayer. So please pray for me and my family, I know it's a difficult time and I am not putting all of the blame on my mother because I don't always help the situations. But pray that both parties can realize a little more that we really do love each other, even though this is a difficult time for all.)